we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize