dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
