Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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