couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize