Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
