i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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