Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
