70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Found the puke drawer
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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