sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
