I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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