I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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