would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
