Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
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I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
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Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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