Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
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I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
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Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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