This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize