I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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