You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
