If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize