Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Randomize