I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
