Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
