remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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