I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
We left the knife in your bed.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize