That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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