The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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