she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.