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• (210): View more from Texas

  I molested 6 butterflies tonight

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  what?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me

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• (718): View more from New York

  Barsexuality is the new black.

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  19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (803): View more from South Carolina

  have you facebook stalked him yet?

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  No, I don’t know his last name...

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Just google his license plate numb

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• (909): View more from California

  I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.

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• (518): View more from New York

  I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp

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• (305): View more from Florida

  I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.

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  17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (937): View more from Ohio

  Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.

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