he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize