...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
