I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
