I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
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