dude i'm inner monologue high
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
be right there i have to get my cape
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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