I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
