Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
