What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
It's blow job season.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
