hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
