I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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