A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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