My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
