Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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