Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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