i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize