I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Randomize