didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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