some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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