i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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