you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
