SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
