So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
