In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
