I molested 6 butterflies tonight
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
